I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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