the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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