How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
