Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
