Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Randomize
