So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
