Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
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After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize