Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Randomize
