Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
