Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
