ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
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I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
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There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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