So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Randomize
