i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I need moral support for this bender
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize