Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
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