Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I love how my cats smell like pot.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
