i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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