Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Operation Purity has been aborted
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
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