Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
