I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
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