Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
