Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
