ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
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