the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Randomize