nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
