maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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