I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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