Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Randomize
