Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
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The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
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There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
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