she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
