Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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