You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
We have started to decorate penises.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
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