is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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