Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
he fucked my hip out of place.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
