woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize