And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
why do cheetos always look like penises
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
