how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
