I swear she didn't look like that last week.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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