brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
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