I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
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