in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Randomize
