one two three fourrrrnication!
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
