so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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