I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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