My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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