I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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