Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
wow bdsm is so cute
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize