Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
