he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
