wakey wakey hands off snakey
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
