we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
