if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
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I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
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So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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