That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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